A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. (Proverbs 15:1 NRSV)
Reflections by Keith Funk
In previous blogs I have shared about the use or misuse of our words. I feel the need to go back to this topic again considering the previous week and the continuing heightening contention and the subsequent demeaning language that characterizes our nation’s political landscape.
From the brief proverb above, these simple words would seem to warrant a moment’s consideration. The message goes without saying. These words are a simple description of the way things are. Quiet, careful, considerate responses bring with them opportunity to quell the possibility of conflict, or one that may be already taking place. On the other hand, words that contend, berate, belittle, and which are inconsiderately offered are more than likely to bring contention or enflame an already acrimonious situation.
My wife’s mother often offered a well-known and well-used saying of her generation to her children: “If you have nothing good to say about someone, don’t say anything at all.” I’m sure many of us have heard this at some point. There’s nothing new or revelatory in these words, but it sure wouldn’t hurt if these words were observed more today.
So back to the previous week. The president gave his State of the Union address. Words were shared to make sure to put the opposition in their place. Responses came back in kind. Contention was heightened, neither side taking pause and each side making sure to establish their position. In doing so, the broad gulf that separates the opposing sides was widened. Yes, the issues are important. But vilifying and condemning the opposition only leads to an increasing erosion of mistrust and enmity. Such behavior is anything but responsible.
As Christians, we now find ourselves in the season of Lent. I understand and observe the season of Lent as a journey in which we follow our Lord to Jerusalem, the cross and the open tomb. Traditionally, Lent is observed as a time for fasting. The time-honored question for those observing the season, “What are you giving up for Lent?”, is often answered by putting aside a perceived excess or a considered vice. (My late beloved father-in-law would observe Lent by fasting from chocolate cake. This was no small deprivation for him as he loved chocolate cake. Forty days without it was quite a sacrifice!) Whatever we fast from during the Lenten season, the point of it is to fix our attention on Jesus and deepening our relationship with him as we prepare for Good Friday and Easter.
Recently, I came upon a list I received during Lent from a previous year. The heading on the paper was simple, “Fast from…Feast on.” The list was adapted from William Arthur Ward, an author, teacher and pastor of the last century. In essence the list was a call to fast from divisive and destructive negatives and to feast on life affirming positives. In this spirit of “Fasting from to Feasting on”, I would like to offer us a practice by which we observe Lent going forward.
Where we find ourselves in situations that beckon us to berate, demean, or debate, may we take pause for a moment of fasting--take a breath and take leave of this urge. Now with the fast, may we then feast. May ours be responses of consideration, empathy, and perhaps even affirmation. Feast on responding with words that build up and fast from words that tear down. If there is nothing positive about which we can feast, then feast on calm and quiet.
The season of Lent, observed in awareness of, and partaking with our Lord on the journey to the cross and open tomb is be traveled in the ways of pursuing peace. May our words give evidence of whom we follow, and who we are in following him. Peace be with you.